Questions-Based Leadership

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Asking questions may be one of the least talked about secret weapons of a great leader. In fact, I believe it may be one of the most undeveloped skills in leadership. Most churches are filled with leaders who are professional communicators. That is, pastors are paid to talk. They spend a good portion of their time figuring out what they are going to say and how they are going to say it, and then delivering the message.

Many business professionals also have a proclivity to talk…a lot. They don’t get hired to ask people questions. They get hired to tell people what they think or believe about a certain topic or product, or which direction the organization is heading.

Isn’t it interesting there are a couple Bible verses that speak direction to the art of listening…

Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak. (James 1:19).

Spouting off before listening to the facts is both shameful and foolish. (Proverbs 18:13)

As author and management consultant Peter Drucker put it,

The leader of the past was a person who knew how to tell. The leader of the future will be a person who knows how to ask.

Back in the day, it was possible for one person to hold most of the knowledge and be able to guide an organization to success through working the system. Not anymore. Today’s world is moving too fast, information is changing too rapidly, and no one person (or group of people) has an edge on what is needed for success.

Additionally, a person who doesn’t ask questions comes off as proud and untouchable. There is an air of superiority that emanates from the know-it-all. He or she may not know it, but others don’t enjoy being around someone who has all the answers.

A person who asks questions

  • assumes there is something she can learn;

  • exudes humility;

  • infuses confidence in people around him;

  • helps introverts or nonverbal leaders communicate;

  • is constantly learning.

A person who doesn’t ask questions

  • assumes she already knows all the facts;

  • exudes a cocky attitude;

  • risks looking like a fool;

  • shuts down people who don’t have as forceful of a personality;

  • impresses himself more than others;

  • forfeits prime learning opportunities.

I had the opportunity to interview author Gary Cohen about his book, Just Ask Leadership. So much of what he wrote connects with my thoughts about leadership. Here are some notable takeaways from the book, and from my conversation with Gary:

  • Hold back. In meetings, leaders have difficulty keeping quiet when they have an idea that’s better than the ones currently being batted around. Revealing that idea, however, often spoils the learning and discovery process of their coworkers.

  • Rein it in. If you think you’re talking too much in a meeting, so does everyone else.

  • Individualize. Centralized leadership doesn’t work with the current generation. People want to work their way, not your way. They know what motivates them and how they best achieve results and obtain information, and they want to receive full credit for their efforts.

  • Get it from the source. The person best equipped to solve a problem is the one who lives with it every day.

When I’ve been at my best, it’s when I’ve been asking questions. Some of my worst leadership moments have come when I’ve started with statements or assumptions rather than questions. Just recently, one of my adult children said to me, “That conversation would have gone down better if you had started with questions.” She was right.

Authenticity is key. You must believe that you actually don’t have all the information, and there is something you can learn. It’s possible to ask questions in order to manipulate people to do what you want and make them think it was their idea. But that’s not authentic, question-based leadership. That might get you what you want. But you risk losing credibility in the process. Gary Cohen said it this way:

The right questions rely on the leader’s ability to communicate authentic interest in learning the answer. They come from a place of not knowing. The right questions are open-ended, carry the possibility of true discovery, and demonstrate a willingness to share and bestow credit.

I think we all can do better asking questions. I know that’s true for me.

Our goal at LeadingSmart is to partner with leaders to solve problems. We have a cohort for executive pastors that meets every month, and also offer consulting in areas such as organizational health, staffing, succession and more. Curious? Shoot me an email or let’s set up a call.

Tim Stevens